Issue 608 Free Range Kids June 9, 2015

So there is a segment of parents who wish to teach their children responsibility.  To do this they allow their children independent action.  What do I mean by this?  Read on to find out.

Free Range Children:  The idea is simple.  Parents let their kids walk to school alone, or in a group with other children.  Or they may allow their kids to go to the park by themselves if the park is down the block.  Advocates say that it allows these children to be taught responsibility to themselves and that it boosts self-confidence.  Basically, as they do not have the crutch of a parent to protect them all the time, they gain self-awareness, and develop psychologically in a way that enables them to protect themselves and also perform independent actions.   As a result, the advocates say that these children are less likely to be targeted by say a bully, or are better able to adapt to a situation on the fly to protect against say an adult.  

Counter argument:  There are people who disagree with this idea (obviously).  They fear the horror stories of the child being kidnaped.  Halloween fears of razors in apples, or something bad happening at the convenience store.  Basically it is fear of the unknown that can harm their children.  And this is understandable, the kids are not adults.  Children can panic, but that may be what initially happens if they are allowed to venture out on their own in the first few weeks.  Over time, the children will become empowered, self-aware and thus less likely to panic in a situation as they will have confidence.  Also, nothing says that a parent has not discussed self-defense, buddy systems, or avoiding criminals.  As such, it really should be up to the parents to decide how much autonomy a child has and at what age.

Conclusion:  Obviously allowing your kids to go off wherever and whenever they want is a bad idea.  But setting limits and allowing them to stop off at the store on the way home to pick up milk or allowing them to go down to the park around the corner is not a bad thing.  Ground rules will be set, defenses and what to do and when will be discussed, but in no way is the child ever truly alone.  I myself was allowed to walk home from my elementary school three blocks away when I was seven years old.  But that was because my parents discussed it, and had friends along the established route I would take home every day to ensure my safety.  As such, I was never actually alone.  I am not a parent, I do not have the same worries yet that a parent would, but this time alone did shape me and made me a better person for it.  So I ask parents who are reading this, look into the idea and see if it is right for your children.