A bully is the child version of an adult who harasses another person either verbally or physically. Or at least that is my definition. These bullies want power and authority over others. Bullies want control over their victims and thus others flock to them for protection and join in the ridicule out of fear of becoming a victim themselves. So how should you deal with a bully?
Verbal Bullies: The best method is to ignore them. These types of bullies are negligible compared to other types. Yes their words may sting, but they are all bark and no bite. This type wants attention, and in some cases knows no other way to interact with others. So they bully others in hopes of making friends through sheer reputation. Of course they don't actually have friends, but that is their problem. Ignoring this type makes them loose all power over you, and thus they will eventually leave you alone.
There is a scenario where this does not work. That is when it is a large group of bullies. Ignoring them may risk further harassment as they encourage each other to do more things to you. In this case, you confront them. You have to fight back in some way shape or form. Usually the best way is to isolate them and then strike back at them then. This can be done by catching them alone or bullying the bully in front of the group. In this method they will realize how small their existence really is. Rare will it be for it to come to violence, but if it does make sure that you are defending yourself and not the attacker.
Physical bullies: For these types who are committing assault against you, there are two options. Options one is the first one you must take and that is tell someone in an authority position. This means a school administrator, your parents or even the police. You must show a history of being targeted by that individual to prevent yourself from becoming a victim of the same punishment they will receive. Once this is done, you may be ignored by the bully or face reprisal by the bully. In short, they will try to beat you harder. Here is where option two comes in. As many people know, most times a bully will not listen to an authority figure and thus continue their assaults. So this is where the last resort comes in, punch them right in the nose. Yes, you heard me, fight back. Let them throw the first punch, and then hit them in the face. This will stun them, and that is where your second strike to the stomach comes in. They must be made aware that you are not to be trifled with. A bully is like a predatory animal, if they see that they will be harmed by messing with you, then they are most likely going to avoid you. The only reason you do not use this option first is because violence is meant to be a last resort. Using it first puts you at risk at being the one punished while the bully gets off free.
Cyber Bullies: These types are much more dangerous than traditional bullies. Unlike traditional bullies where you are safe once you reach home, cyber bullies can follow you. Cyber bullies use things like Facebook, MySpace, and Twitter to attack you publicly and as often as they want. Some even call their victims on their cell phones or text them horrible and insulting messages. There is no safe place from the torment. So what can you do to save yourself? One idea is to cut your self off from all social media. This means getting off Facebook and twitter entirely. It also means exchanging your cell number for a new one which only your most "trusted" friends and family have the number to. If these bullies find out about the new number, they will try to get it, and they have even been known to use computer programs to hide the fact that they are the ones sending the messages in the first place. So you may even want to forget about a cell phone all together. Second options is creating a new Facebook or twitter account with an alternative name for yourself and have it devoid of pictures of yourself. By doing this, it becomes that much harder for the bullies to track you down. Your friends who have access to your page must be only your most trusted friends who will not rat you out to the bully or give any hint that the new page belongs to you. If worse comes to worse, then only family members will and should have access to your Facebook or other social media site. Basically, you must find a way to shut them out, as traditional methods to stop bulling will not work here. You cannot confront a cyber bully as they feel invincible on the net.
Conclusion: I know from experience what it is like to be bullied. But I have only ever faced the first two types of bullies, but never a cyber bully. However, I understand how painful it is, and how much you must want to find a way to hurt them as much as they hurt you. You are allowed to fight back. But when you do, do it on your terms. Do not let the bully provoke you, but make sure that when you strike back, that you have control of the situation. Start with verbal and tell authority figures. It may seem useless, but it sets the bully up to take the fall. It gets them on record for being a bully. Once known, you may strike back with your hands as the last resort to defend yourself. Never use a weapon on a bully, but if the bully has one, then you run and call the cops. If a bully is assaulting you that badly, call the cops and charge them with assault. There is no excuse not to call on their aid when you are being abused. As to the cyber bully threat, if you know who they are in real life then the strategies for verbal and physical bullies may work. Or again call the cops and tell them you are being harassed. For those incapable of fighting back on your own, find help. Get your friends together and become like a pack of wolfs or a pride of lions. Safety does come from numbers. Bullies on the web can also be attacked back by you and your friends. Use their weapon against them if you can (but again as a last resort). You have the power to overcome them and stop being a victim. There are numerous ways to fight back; you just have to choose the right method and timing to do so.
I dedicate this Issue to all those who have been bullied and the families of those parents who lost children due to a bully’s abuse. I would like nothing more than to put those bullies before a jury as an adult and send them to prison for what they did. Know this, you the parents and your children who are bullied are not alone in this fight.
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